2013

Goodbye 2012... Hello 2013!

Well, it's official guys.... the world did not end! But did we honestly think it was going to? This picture is such a great reminder for me that last year is now long gone. 2012 was definitely a roller coaster for me. In one year so many things have happened, both good and bad. I graduated with my Master's degree, I was offered a job, I had my heart broken.. twice, I moved into my own place on the other side of town, I've continued to run my heart out, I've been blessed with some amazing friends, and I have continued to grow spiritually. 

With all of the ups and downs of this year, I've decided to take a few moments each day (most likely first thing in the morning or last thing at night) and journal a few thoughts from that day. Writing things down always seems to help me realize what is truly important. Lately, I have been graced with truly the best family and friends I could ask for. When I'm complaining and whining about a problem I am facing, they continue to be my shoulder to lean on, take my mind off things, and remind me that the future will hold so much for me. Thank you my dear family and friends (you know who you are) who truly hold my heart. You show me that despite the circumstances, God has a plan. Regardless of the negativity, there will be a lesson that replaces it and will bring joy. That sometimes... there is no explanation or understanding for anything... it just IS. Isn't that the beauty of life as we know it? 

I have never been one to make New Year resolutions. I feel like I stick to it for a month and then I forget about it. So instead of a resolution, I want to make some goals for this year... 

• Take a few moments each day to journal... even a sentence
• Volunteer more
• Don't work too much overtime 
• Surround myself with positive, uplifting people
• Continue to be open and have a trusting heart
• Go to church more
• Get more massages :)

Let's make this year a great one, all! 

Hidden Treasure as of late:  God only gives us enough that we can handle. The more you have to go through, the stronger God must think you are!

Tis the Season

The holidays always gets me mushy gushy about how thankful I am for everyone and everything around me and that I have been blessed with. For the people who know me, you know where I work and what I do, the people I come into contact with, and what I witness on a daily basis. PEOPLE- GIVE THANKS for what you have. It truly is rare and a blessing. There are so many other people out there who don't have an ounce of what we have. So this season, as we splurge our money on gifts that we think are "adequate" lets remember what others who are not as fortunate are receiving this year.

It's that time to pick a donation center, volunteer, and give back to the community. Send a care package to military men and women overseas. Adopt a family. Serve food at a food bank. Do whatever your heart desires... but I'm going to be that advocate to say... STEP IT UP!

Speaking of good causes... one of my very good friends Julie has a fundraiser for the Kanzius Foundation. Take a gander at her page where it says it all and give back to raise awareness for lung cancer! http://www.firstgiving.com/fundraiser/juliebohling/helpfulphiljuliesrunsandfundraisingof2012

In honor of the holiday season... I feel it is important to list what I am most thankful for and my highlighted moments of the year. Shall we?

Finally visited the Grand Canyon for the first time

Graduated with my Master's Degree

Spent Mother's day in Flagstaff :)

Celebrated a gorgeous Chi Omega/Sigma Chi wedding with my sisters

Made a Call Me Maybe? YouTube video with the staches.... 

Danced the night away at the 80's Bar Crawl

Spent the birthday at the Brush Bar drinking mimosas

Getting pooped on by birds in California... TWICE

Lunch and shopping dates with the best gal pals

Running into the BFF at Tequila Sunrise 

Wobbling around Flagstaff in homemade fanny packs with these gals

Reuniting with my sisters 

Going to California Adventure for the first time!

Thanksgiving Classic 10 mile run

Las Vegas Rock N Roll Half Marathon

Hidden Treasures: Having a job, a home, a family, and legs to run!

Painful Endings and Beautiful Beginnings

"Bask in the luxury of being fully understood and unconditionally loved. Dare to see yourself as I see you: radiant in My righteousness, cleansed by My blood." -Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

I don't think I'm the only one who craves that unconditional love by someone in life. Isn't that what we all ultimately want? That person who no matter what is going to always be by your side, have your back, and be your best friend? Call me crazy for wanting such a thing... When do we know when we truly have that? Anyone at any moment can leave your life. You know... "the one," "your person," the individual you thought you were going to spend a future with, you talked about marriage and children with; the person who told you they're in it for the long haul... Thing is- it's all words. How do we know when it's real, fake, or 50/50? I guess I can answer my own question- WE DON'T. As human beings we have to figure it out the hard way, and trust me- I have had my fair share of figuring it out the hard way. I guess that's life though. And the beauty of it...? One day, we'll find that person who truly stands by their words and their actions, and who truly means those things. I have a slight feeling when that person comes into our lives, a glimmering light will shine down from heaven just to let us know "TAAADAAAAA!!! You found them!!!!!" (Just kidding, but it's nice to imagine) Instead, we have to follow our hearts, be open to love, let our guards down, and deal with the pain and the agony when people let us down.

I used to hate the phrase, "It's not you, it's me." But now I think "yeah, it is." BECAUSE IT IS! I found this excerpt from Susan J. Elliot on her Getting Past Your Breakup Blog...

Sometimes people are simply INCAPABLE of knowing a good thing when they see it. They have other agendas, other issues, other unfinished business that has NOTHING to do with you, but unfortunately you get to bear the brunt of it. Embrace the rejection from those people. It saves you YEARS of being the unwitting object of their unfinished crap.

There comes a point where we have to realize we are never going to understand why things ended the way they did, where the problem went wrong. I've sat here and pondered and NOTHING answers my questions. That's where faith steps in. Faith that EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. Faith that God has a much better plan ahead. And that my friends, is true and gets me through my toughest days. 

I'll admit... I've always been someone who likes to curl up on the couch, be away from the world, and watch a movie when I'm sad. And then eventually, I'll talk to my closest friends about it. I've really learned to rely on those people. That is what friends are there for. To listen to you and give you advice and be there for you. I don't know what I would do without those people in my life. SO THANK YOU. You all know who you are. 

By now (yes I am only 24, but trust me I have had a lot of heart break for a young age), I'd say it'd be pretty easy for me to put some walls up, some very high walls to guard my heart. But what good does that do? As much as heart breaks SUCK, I'd rather know I am capable of loving and opening up to someone than being a closed off individual. Once again, I'm going to steal from my good friend Susan J. Elliot...

Don’t take rejection hard or personally. It happens in life. It doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you. It means the person, the job, the situation is not right for YOU. Even if you want it to be right…even if you really want that lover, that friend, that job, that house, that apartment, that whatever….doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for you and maybe they see it clearer than you. Or maybe they don’t appreciate you and you don’t want that in your life anyway.

It’s hard to put yourself out there. It’s hard to put the power in someone else’s hands. It feels like leading with your chin.

But you can overcome rejection, whether present rejection or long-ago rejection. Just keep the positive self-talk going, do your affirmations and know you are worth it and deserve all the good things that life has to offer.

"Approach problems with a light touch. When your mind moves toward a problem area, you tend to focus on that situation so intensely that you lose sight of Me. You pit yourself against the difficulty as if you had to conquer it immediately. Your mind gears up for battle, and your body becomes tense and anxious." -Sarah Young, Jesus Calling


"Leave outcomes up to me. Follow me wherever I lead, without worrying about how it will all turn out. Think of your life as an adventure, with Me as your Guide and Companion. Live in the now, concentrating on staying in step with Me." -Sarah Young, Jesus Calling

Hidden Treasure: Sometimes we just need that extra learning lesson to have that "AHA!" moment. 

Cold Tangerines

If you haven't noticed, our society and especially our generation (I think) focuses on the negative much more than the positive. Think about it: when you turn on the news, you hear about how many trains crashed this year and how many people died. You don't hear how many children were adopted or how homelessness has decreased. We have a GALORE of self-help books. We LOVE self-help! I am including myself in this too, so I cannot judge. We hone in on how to make ourselves the "better versions of ourselves" and how to live a life full of happiness. Why, as human beings, do we constantly search for something more? We're always looking for the next thing right around the corner. We're always looking forward to our "BIG MOMENT." 

A very special friend of mine knew I was going through a tough time a few months ago. Personally, I think one of the best gifts you can give is your understanding, compassion, and a good book to explain all of the above. That is just what she did. For my graduation present, I was given the book Cold Tangerines written by Shauna Niequist. 

I have probably 100 quotes highlighted that stood out to me. However, one of my favorites is in the very first chapter when discussing the urban myth of the BIG MOMENT... you know, that moment where EVERYTHING makes sense, the climax of the movie where everyone's life changes, the wedding day, the perfect job, etc. Instead, "in glimpses in flashes, that thing I'm waiting for, that adventure, that movie-score-worthy experience unfolding gracefully. This is it. Normal, daily life ticking by on our streets and sidewalks, in our houses and apartments, in our beds and at our dinner tables, in our dreamers and prayers and fights and secrets- this pedestrian life is the most precious thing any of us will ever experience." I could not have said it better myself. 

We're always waiting to be something more, looking forward to the better versions of ourselves. I know in high school I couldn't wait to start college and be a psychology major. I thought for sure I was going to go on to get my PhD and be a therapist. When I graduated, I realized I am not ready to be done with school and my passion had changed to more criminology. Those gruesome and stressful two years all I could think about was being able to say "I have a Master's degree" and start my career path. Now that I have done both things, I'm finding myself still waiting. Waiting for what exactly? Well, I want to settle down. I'll admit I want someone to share life's little moments with, have a family, buy a house, etc. But once that happens, guess what? I'll still be waiting. So these past few weeks, my goal is to remind myself everyday, every time I daydream of the future or get down in the dumps because life doesn't seem "perfect" yet, that the present- the here and now- is what leads to those moments. If I pass these little moments by, I may miss the path I am supposed to take. Who knew? Thank you Cold Tangerines. 

So what better thing to do than enjoy the simple pleasures...

Visited Flagstaff and had a gorgeous hike/run with a good friend

Random road trips to clear my head and thank God for everything!

Almost get killed in this new phenomenon in AZ called a "haboob" 

Turn up the music and drown out everything else in the world 

Become a wannabe gymnast in the 2012 Olympics.. duh

Go to Diamondbacks games, drink a beer, eat a hot dog, and be merry

Reunite with best friends and seriously... laugh all day and night long (the best medicine)

Celebrate a beautiful wedding with an amazing sisterhood <3 CHI OMEGA 

Laugh hideously at things like this ^^^

And most importantly, be humbled and remember my roots, where I came from, and who will always support me. I love you family.

Not every day is easy, exciting, or uplifting. I've endured some emotional, down, and difficult days these past few months. And I know these types of days will continue, but what will also continue is life's little moments- that Michael Jackson song that comes on Pandora that you can't help but dance in your car to, a random text from someone telling you how great of a person you are, a delicious coffee, a good book, and trust in something much much bigger than all of this. 

"I'm thankful for God's constant flickering and sparking flame inside me, planted in me years ago and fighting to keep burning. For a season, I didn't think it mattered much, but now I know that tiny flame is the most precious thing I have, and that it can ignite a forest fire inside any heart and can burn away a lifetime of apathy and regret and distance."       -Shauna Niequist

Life's hidden treasures as of late....

• How peaceful rainy days can feel
• A new apartment to call home
• The unexpected person who comes into your life
• Something as simple as a cold tangerine...

Hooded and Educated

The time has finally arrived.... I have officially received my Master's of Science in Applied Criminology!!!!!! This day and weekend was by far the happiest moment in my life so far. I could not have made it this far and where I am today without my Lord and Savior, my supportive family, and my amazing friends and graduate school program. To all of the people who dealt with my complaining, my bitching and whining over all the reading and 20 page papers I had, who saw me cry and stress to the max, who accompanied me to the library until 2 am, and who motivated me to get through the hard work.... a huge THANK YOU!!!! 

Just passed my internship defense!

One of my best friends I met at NAU... received his MBA!

Pre-graduation celebration with the brother

3 generations <3

After graduation I was finally able to breathe... although it still has not hit me yet! I have been able to spend time with my close friends and relax... This means lots of pool time and soaking up the sun, reading for fun, and beautiful runs outside......

...AND FINALLY VISITING THE GRAND CANYON

Spending the day with no plans, 80 degree weather, and with two of my great friends was such a blessing! Who knew just gazing at rocks and a huge hole in the ground could be so relaxing? I was also lucky enough to have my amazing family and grandparents here for Mother's Day.